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 Mind Your Own Fuckhole
Chris Cryptic
 Posted: Jul 19 2017, 11:36 PM
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[The camera pans across the sold out, amped up crowd in the GIO Canberra Stadium before finally resting at the announce table where Brian “The Voice of the House” Morris sits excitedly by Tats Richardson.]

Brian Morris: Ladies and Gentlemen, we come to you tonight from the GIO Canberra Stadium for Mind Your Own Fuckhole!

Tats Richardson: That’s right and what a night this will be. We have FOUR Championship matches for you tonight. Some probably don’t even remember, but this time last year we only had two championships. The In Your House Championship and our Tag Team belts.

BM: And tonight we make history by introducing The Rapid Fire Championship. I for one am extremely excited to see how tonight plays out.

TR: Up first we have some singles action for you all as Cheesecake takes on Suzanne Carlisle. Then we’ll have our first title match as Shawn Fox defends the Proving Grounds belts against Jessica Anderson and Seth Iser in a triple threat match.

TR: It would have been a singles match at our last Ruckus show, Jessica and Seth both managed to pin each other in a match so Chris Cryptic made the decision to make them both number one contenders.

BM: Then Kelly Furys dream comes true as she teams up with friend Gordon Fury to take on Serena Maxwell and Raine of War Enforcement. This match all started as War Enforcement seem to have a problem with Gordon Fury and went as far as to try and attack him after his match against Blyss Lockhart, luckily for him Kelly Fury came out to his aid.

TR: For weeks this battle has been brewing so it will definitely be one to watch. Following that we’ll have more tag team action as Murphys Law defend the belts against Uncanny Socialites.

BM: Uncanny Socialites are hungry for gold, but Murphys Law have been unstoppable against all the teams here. It’s going to take a lot from Uncanny Socialites to pull out the win tonight. And then history in the making as Sam Amos takes on Craig Anderson to crown our first ever Rapid Fire Champion.

TR: And last but certainly not least, IYH Champion Owen Gonsalves will take on Diamond Jack Sabbath with the belt on the line in our Main Event.

BM: Both Angelica Layne and Jack Sabbath are fond of telling Owen he doesn’t deserve the belt, but I know he has the heart and the drive to prove everyone wrong yet again here tonight.

TR: It’s early in the night, so lets agree to disagree on that one. Before we get into the action I’m receiving word that Stevie Trelain is standing by backstage.


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[A calm and collected Stevie Terlain has a somewhat unenviable task considering some of the personalities in the company and she does let out the slightest sigh knowing what’s coming before beaming to the camera with a bubbly smile.]

ST: With the Proving Grounds Championship match upon us we all know what is on the line there and Seth Iser...the time is upon us.

[Iser walks in with an intimidating sneer and there are some members of the audience booing already at his presence wearing black and gold variant on his attire with the gleam from his golden knee brace shining through.]

ST: It certainly seems you have agitated a handful of the people who bought the tickets.

SI: There are lots of things agitating Stevie. A gnat near your eye is something that is agitating. Trying to kill that fly that flies so close to your soup in a restaurant is something that will agitate you. Some punk kids who think this sport is easy can also be agitating to someone who's been around the block and that does agitate me on some level But what agitates me right now is not getting the desired result when you know in your heart of hearts it should be different. A draw is just as bad as a loss in our sport.

[Iser sneers at that last statement with a twitch of his eye showing his disgust at the end result of the previous match.]

SI: But alas...here we are and instead of whining and complaining like so many people would about a triple threat in this situation I look at it as two asses to kick instead of one to prove a point. The point being I’m one of the best wrestlers in the world and nobody has the ability that i do up here bell to bell.

[Iser just points at his skull briefly.]

ST: But you’re facing the current champion Shawn Fox and the woman you fought to a draw in Jessica Anderso--

SI: I’m going to cut you off mid sentence before YOU agitate me. So please keep the microphone up here...and your mouth shut.

[Iser’s finger point after delivering that message doesn’t win him any friends.]

SI: I’m going to be gladly disappointing Jessica Anderson, someone who went on social media just a couple days before the event declaring to the entire world that she just then realized it was a triple threat! So no new picture to sell to the degenerates who pleasure themselves to you with you wearing gold. Just a bruised lip, maybe a chipped tooth and dashed dreams because you aren’t winning the gold when we settle who REALLY is the better wrestler. And I doubt when those things happen you’ll try to contact my manager to try to pass a message ‘Nice match’ when those things happen.

[Iser just tilts his head to the side for a second before he just continues speaking.]

SI: But we can’t leave out the man of the hour. The champion. Someone who loves to equally patronize people with those two dreaded words. But yeah Fox I know you’re a rising star here with how you’ve fought and retained that championship. But there’s a different kind of challenge ahead of you. Not only Jessica but more importantly...someone like me. Someone who has a bit of a history of doing whatever it takes to whomever it takes. And you can go ahead and ask the man right now in Owen to have an idea what that means.

[Iser just brushes his hair to the side before he just has his arms crossed.]

SI: To point blank it all you two...I’ve done a ton of bad things to people in my career and my life in order to survive. I survived two abusive parents who loved religion more than me. I survived the demon of alcoholism that ended up killing said parents. I’ve not only survived but thrived in this industry for sixteen years long after I’ve blown my left knee out and was told I shouldn’t even pursue it and I’d be dead by thirty! And I’d be beyond agitated in what I’d do to someone if I didn’t achieve something I haven’t in several years...and I think you two will have the agitation and inconvenience of a hospital stay if that’s what it takes to get the job done.

[There are obvious veins showing up over Iser’s head. He’s worked himself into a fury.]

SI: There’s going to be no compliments about a nice match. Two words that have tainted our industry when it should be a matter of results in an industry taken after the damned gladiators! They aren’t going to talk about those nice pictures. And they damn sure aren’t going to talk about how great the current champion is despite his patronizing! All they’re going to talk about is Seth Iser is the new Proving Grounds Champion and wondering out loud how in God’s name you’re going to stop me.

[Iser just pauses for a second as if to try to calm down ever so slightly.]

SI: Because I’m willing to bet in the grand scheme of things on this night in the middle of THAT ring in front of these idiotic fans who don’t know a god damned thing about how the industry SHOULD be like...neither of you two will have the answer because there won’t be a god damned thing you two can do to stop me.

[Iser ends up stomping off as Stevie looks off at the larger wrestler and lets out a sigh as we fade from view.]


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Singles Match
Cheesecake vs Suzanne Carlisle

DING DING DING!

[As soon as the bell rings, Cheesecake shoves Suzanne hard, leaving her to fall over backwards. The crowd jeers at the disrespectful display but Cheesecake is completely unfazed as she lashes out verbally at her former friend. Suzanne meekly pulls herself up. Cheesecake then charges at Suzanne with a forearm smash. Suzanne sees it coming a mile away and sidesteps it, throwing Cheesecake into the corner. Cheesecake stops herself in time as Suzanne comes charging at her. Cheesecake smashes Suzanne’s face with a back elbow before hopping up to the top turnbuckle while Suzanne staggers, clutching her nose. Cheesecake flies off the top with a dropkick that lands Suzanne hard on the mat. Suzanne rolls over to push herself up when Cheesecake stomps down hard on her back. Suzanne yelps in pain, arching her back. Cheesecake pulls up Suzanne in a side headlock. Suzanne starts fighting back with punches before tossing Cheesecake into the ropes. On the rebound, Cheesecake knocks down Suzanne with a clothesline. With a smirk, Cheesecake looks down on Suzanne before running the ropes again. Suzanne rolls over, forcing Cheesecake to leap over her. As Cheesecake bounces off the ropes, Suzanne charges at her for a swinging hurricanrana that leaves her tumbling across the ring in a daze. Cheesecake pulls herself up before rushing towards Suzanne. Suzanne catches her in an armdrag. Cheesecake snaps to vertical base and makes a mad dash to Suzanne again, only to get thrown over in a second armdrag. Cheesecake cries out in frustration before charging at Suzanne once more. This time, as Suzanne prepares for another arm drag, Cheesecake blocks her attempt and reverses it with an irish whip to the ropes. Suzanne flips to rebound in a handspring back elbow that connects right to Cheesecake’s face. Suzanne hooks Cheesecake’s leg for the pin but Cheesecake kicks out in time.

The match resumes with Suzanne going with a grounded armbar. Cheesecake gradually pulls herself up, struggling to escape the hold. Suzanne switches to a hammerlock as Cheesecake makes it to her feet. Still unable to break free, Cheesecake hits a couple of back elbows to throw Suzanne off a bit. Cheesecake then turns around and drags Suzanne to the corner to smash her face into the turnbuckle. As Suzanne slumps in the corner, Cheesecake raises her leg up to use her foot as a chokehold. The crowd voices their disapproval. The referee steps in to separate them, giving Cheesecake a warning. Smirking, Cheesecake backs off, but only to get some distance before charging at Suzanne for a spear. But right before the collision, Suzanne pulls herself up on top of the ropes, leaving Cheesecake to crash hard into the mid-tier turnbuckle. Cheesecake struggles to pull herself up when Suzanne stretches out to plant herself over her back and grabs her in an octopus hold. Caught in the trap, Cheesecake struggles to break free while screaming “get off meeeee!” Suzanne maintains control with all her might, saying “I'm sorry!!!” Cheesecake continues to struggle until Suzanne puts her feet down to transition to a gannosuke clutch, landing with a pin. But Cheesecake kicks out just before three. Competition continues to heat up as they trade punches while on their knees. Suzanne manages to pull herself up before going for a roundhouse kick but Cheesecake ducks, sending her in a spin, then takes her down with a schoolgirl pin. Suzanne kicks out at two and scrambles to her feet. Cheesecake reaches for the ropes to pull herself up. Suzanne charges at Cheesecake who dives out of the way, leaving Suzanne to crash into the ropes. As Suzanne bounces off backwards, Cheesecake steals the opportunity to catch her with a hangman’s neckbreaker. The impact has Suzanne gripping her neck in agony on the landing. Sensing the end is near, Cheesecake pulls up Suzanne to her feet and sets her up in the corner for her elevated DDT finisher, Sweet Treat. It connects, and Suzanne is finally out for the count. Cheesecake hooks both legs for the pin.]

1!

2!

3!

DING DING DING!

TH: And here’s your winner… Cheesecake!

[“Dressed To Kill” by New Found Glory starts playing, inviting a round of jeers from the crowd. Sitting up next to Suzanne who’s still looking dazed, Cheesecake can be heard saying, “Told ya… I can outwrestle ya… Told ya I’d beat ya...” The referee motions for Cheesecake to stand with her hand raised but Cheesecake brushes him off with a grimace.]

BM: Cheesecake standing tall tonight! What a victory!

TR: Shit, who would’ve thought huh? Now no one can say Cheesecake can’t wrestle.

BM: I don’t disagree with that, but she still needs to keep her attitude in check.

TR: She’s a teenager, Bry! Let her live!

BM: For tonight, sure. After a match like that, she should be proud. But that doesn’t mean I’m now her biggest fan though.


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[The scene fades in backstage, where Craig and Jessica Anderson are discussing their big night ahead. Jessica is already dressed in her gear, as her match is earlier in the show.]

JA: I'm excited, but I'm getting very nervous now!

CA: It's okay to be nervous – but don't let it have an impact on your performance. You and I both know that you are more than capable of winning that match!

JA: I know I can win it, but I've not had the best of luck with triple threat matches...

CA: Form goes out the window here, Jess. Remember your first title win? You became the number one contender by winning a triple threat match, so you CAN do it. And I have every confidence in you to do so!

[Jess smiles at her husband's words of encouragement, as they are exactly what she needed to hear ahead of her match. But it's obviously not all about her tonight – her husband has equally as important a match.]

JA: I know I can do it, and I'll go out there trying my absolute hardest. But you shouldn't be worrying about me. You know that if I win a title tonight and you don't, you're never going to hear the end of it... Right?!

[She says that with a wink and a giggle, which Craig responds to by pulling her in for a quick hug.]

CA: I wouldn't have it any other way, sweet...

CA: SWEET MOTHER OF JESUS, HE'S HERE AGAIN!

[From the corner of his eye, Craig sees Braeden Corbett approaching with a magnifying glass in hand. The sock enthusiast walks towards them, frantically looking at the ground searching for clues. He almost walks past the couple, until Jessica calls his name.]

JA: Uh... Braeden?!

[Braeden turns around, shocked to see Jessica.]

BC: HELLO JESSICA HAVE YOU SEEN CRAIG?

[Jessica and Craig look at him oddly, before Craig steps forwards.]

CA: Braeden, I'm right here.

[Braeden takes one look at Craig, not entirely with it.]

BC: HELLO CRAIG, I'M LOOKING FOR CRAIG HAVE YOU SEEN HIM?

[Craig sighs, but Jessica cannot hold back her laughter.]

CA: BRAEDEN, I'M LITERALLY RIGHT HERE!

[Braeden finally clicks on, realising that Craig is actually right in front of him.]

BC: OH CRAIG, I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU FOR ABOUT HALF AN HOUR HELLO

CA: It's actually been months, but okay...

BC: HELLO CRAIG I HAVE A QUESTION NOW MAY I PLEASE ASK IT?

[Craig, once again, sighs. But he nods his head, defeated.]

CA: Sure, go ahead!

BC: HELLO CRAIG TONIGHT YOU GO ONE-ON-ONE WITH YOUR WI--

[Craig and Jess both cut him off, before both replying in unison.]

CA and JA: Braeden, that match was ages ago!

BC: IT WAS?

JA: Yes...

BC: OH OKAY, I HAVE ANOTHER QUESTION HELLO

CA: For goodness sake. What is it?

BC: Tonight, you both have the biggest matches of your IYHWF careers. How are you both feeling, knowing that you could both be leaving tonight with gold around your waists?

[Craig and Jess both look on confused. Braeden actually spoke like an actual human being, and asked an actual question!]

CA: Sorry, can you please repeat that?

BC: DO YOU LIKE SOCKS? HELLO

[Craig and Jess both sigh, shaking their heads.]

CA: That's what I thought you said...

[Craig and Jess both leave the scene, to continue to get ready for their matches.]


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Proving Grounds Championship Match
Triple Threat Match
Shawn Fox © vs Jessica Anderson vs Seth Iser

[Shawn hands the referee the Proving Grounds Championship, keeping an eye on Seth Iser as he moves to shake Jessica’s hand in a show of respect. The referee holds up the belt and hands it down to the timekeeper before he calls for the bell.]

DING DING DING!

[Jessica starts fair aggressive, hitting a dropkick straight into Iser’s chest then she rolls to her feet fast, sliding past to rebound off the ropes, and catches him in the back with another dropkick! This time though he turns and catches her before she can get up, pulling her up by the hair and slinging her right into the advancing Proving Grounds Champion Shawn Fox! Out of instinct he catches her and sets her down and laughs as she drops and sweeps his leg! She rolls up to her feet and dodges Seth’s incoming clothesline. Shawn comes up and Seth hits him with a hard lariat that drops him, but also unfortunately for Iser lets him fire off a Fox Your Face, the super stiff Pele kick sending the big man reeling! Jessica swoops behind him and drops, causing him to fall over her backwards and he clips the ropes as he falls! He seems unfazed however and catches her with a huge release German suplex that sends her into the near corner. She comes back out just as Shawn jumps up and hits a split-legged missile dropkick that has all three down on the mat.]

BM: Shawn has worked hard for that belt, if he wins tonight he can cash it in for a shot at the In Your House Championship.

TR: He’d be the first Proving Grounds Champion that’s been able to do it...IF he can do it.

[Shawn shoots up to his feet and delivers a classic Garvin Stomp to the downed Iser who lashes at him with a huge fist from the prone position but Shawn nimbly sidesteps it and jumps harder on the next stomp. A kneedrop to the head has Seth a bit more docile but as Shawn looks to set up for his next move suddenly there is Jessica Anderson with a backstabber! He hits the mat and she gets him with a standing senton but when she covers he kicks out at two, rolling towards the ropes. Seth is still down so she checks the distance and goes up top fast, setting up for her corkscrew 620 senton the Show Stealer but before she can leap off, Seth pulls Jessica down by the hair inside the ring and knees her in the midsection. As she doubles over, Seth takes her down with his DDT finisher, Deprivation DDT! It knocks out Jessica completely and Seth shoves her out of the ring. The referee warns him off as Shawn moves to the ropes to see if Jessica is okay, but his moment of concern costs him big as Seth moves the referee out of the way and slams his elbow into Shawn’s temple. Seth goes for another elbow shot but Shawn ducks and kicks him right in the gut. Seth staggers back before collapsing on one knee, clutching his stomach. While he recovers, Shawn quickly regains his bearings as well. Shawn then staggers over to Seth, his clenched right fist at the ready. While the referee checks on Jessica outside, Shawn pulls up Seth, Seth tries to fight back. Shawn backs off before taking a step forward again. Unfortunately, this gives Seth time to pull something from his boot and before anyone can say anything, a flashing ball of fire explodes in Shawn’s face. The crowd gasps before drowning out the arena with passionate jeers as Shawn drops on the floor, clutching his face in agony. The referee slides back into the ring, unaware of what just happened. Seeing the reaction from the fans, the ref demands to know but Seth denies before going for the cover on Shawn. The ref hesitantly starts the count.

1!

2!

3!

DING DING DING!

TH: And here is your winner via pinfall and NEW Proving Grounds Champion… SETH ISER!!

BM: That son of a bitch!

TR: Holy shit, that was a fucking fireball! A FIREBALL!!!

BM: Dammit, Tats! I’m sure that really hurt Shawn! Check on him, ref!

['Gehenna' by Slipknot plays as the fans boo heavily at the actions of the new Champion, who looks impassively out at the mass of humanity. The medical team comes running from backstage to attend to Shawn and Jessica. The referee presents Seth the Proving Ground title belt and raises his hand in victory, but Seth just pushes him away before simply exiting the ring.]

BM: Is this really the way to win a championship, Seth? That was seriously uncalled for!

TR: Ay… Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do, right?

BM: No, not like this.

TR: Yeah it’s a little extreme… Damn, as much as I like to shit on Shawn sometimes, I hope the guy’s alright.

BM: I hope so too. And Jessica too. This is just annihilation by Seth.

TR: And so a new reign begins...


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[Cameras cut backstage, and the fans cheer when Kelsey Spencer and Rebecca Saint are shown in the locker room area. Rebecca is in her typical pose - arms folded, body turned slightly from the camera, a frown painted upon her face. Kelsey’s body language is a little different; she seems more welcoming. Nervous, yet somewhat relaxed. Kelsey is first to speak to us.]

KS: Tonight’s the night. Everything’s come down to this - Murphy’s Law versus Uncanny Socialites. You know, I’ve been in this spot before; a big title match on a Supershow. The first time was a shot at State of Anarchy’s Tag Team Titles, with a different partner. I ate the pin in that match; I let my team down. The last time - or, I should say most recent - happened at the most recent Supershow, Wrath of the Gods 2, where I couldn’t hold onto my championship.

[She wears that warm, glowing grin on her face that many of her fans find endearing.]

KS: But you know, I’ve learned from those failures; that first loss, while it was soul-crushing, taught me to trust in my tag team partner and believe they’ve got everything under control. The second loss - the Ladder Match - taught me that taking your eyes off the prize for just one second can cost you everything. Every match I’ve had - every experience that’s led me to this moment in my life - has made me a little stronger, a little smarter. They say the third time’s the charm, and well, I’m feeling pretty confident about that.

[Rebecca turns toward the camera slightly, indicating she wishes to speak.]

RS: The thing is, while our focus is solely on what is going to happen tonight, Murphy’s Law is doing the opposite. They have taken the liberty to name themselves the first team to successfully defend the In Your House Tag Team Titles twice. They are already declaring victory. And while they are no doubt looking to see which team they will be next in line to challenge for their third defense, they will not get that far.

[She looks away from the camera for a moment, glaring back with contempt.]

RS: Murphy’s Law crossed a line this past week when they decided to show up at our get together. We had planning this for quite some time, with selfless motivation.

[Rebecca temporarily unfolds her arms to point a curved thumb in Kelsey’s direction.]

RS: When I say “we”, I mean she planned and asked, then I reluctantly accepted. When Murphy’s Law stood there and made those children cry, I’ll admit, I got hot. Despite the public’s general perception of me, I am not some heartless monster with no empathy. But to misconstrue such an emotion as weakness is foolish. Anger has gotten me out of a pinch many times, won me many championships.

[Rebecca’s arms fall to her sides as she steps forward, firing herself up with her own words. There is a considerable difference in Kelsey’s posture, also - her shoulders are pushed back, her chin has lifted ever-so-slightly since the segment began. It seems she has been given a healthy dose of confidence herself.]

RS: On that fateful day, Misha LeCavalier claimed that not one of the teams they have clashed with would have acted in such a manner to their interruption. Perhaps there is a reason for that. State of Anarchy and Jetpack are not the challengers tonight; we are. The reason you have held onto those championships as long as you have is simple… You have never had to defend them against the Uncanny Socialites. You will not be making history at our expense.

[Disgruntled, Rebecca folds her arms and steps back. A tranquil Kelsey steps forward, watching the floor beneath her feet as she does. She doesn’t exhibit the same aggressive feelings as her partner; she appears almost stoic as she prepares to address the team’s opponents. She lifts her chin, her big brown eyes locking onto the camera lens.]

KS: A lot of people are gonna look at this match and say we have nothing to lose. And yeah, they’re sorta right - we don’t have anything materialistic on the line. But our pride is. Our integrity was pulled into question Friday - more specifically, my integrity. I promised everyone a fun family day out in a relaxed, carefree environment; fans could come hang out with us, swap stories, meet like-minded people and just have a good time in general. And when it didn’t go down that way… well, it means I broke a promise to our fans. Murphy’s Law, your actions on Friday made me a liar.

[She cringes as she reflects on how everything fell apart.]

KS: I’m not a girl that has a lot in life. I’ve never had a big house, I’ve never had a whole lotta money… One thing I pride myself on is being a role model to those who feel as though they’re worthless. I wanna give fans hope that if they do things right - if they’re always kind and respectful to others - that they can make their dreams come true. I firmly believe that’s possible, and I think our fans can feel that. At the end of it all, the only thing I’ve really got is my word. When you show up and discredit everything I’ve said, well… You’re tying my hands. You’re leaving me with little choice but to discredit everything you’ve said in return - as long as there’s breath in this body, you won’t be the first team to successfully defend those titles twice.

[Rebecca has a few parting words for the Tag Team Champions.]

RS: You want so badly to be the center of attention? That’s fine. There will be plenty of people talking about Murphy’s Law following tonight… As the team the Uncanny Socialites defeated to win their first In Your House Tag Team Championship.


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Tag Team Match
Gordon Fury & Kelly Fury vs War Enforcement

DING DING DING!

[The match kicks off with Gordon and Raine and although it takes a few shots to weaken Raine down, Gordon gets the upperhand after a Running Enzuigiri. As Gordon works over Raine to keep control of the match, Kelly signals for a tag but Gordon ignores her wishing to continue the match himself. Gordon pulls Raine to his feet and runs to the ropes, but Serena runs along the apron and kicks Gordon on the back of his head. Gordon stumbles towards Raine, who quickly gets him in an Octopus Hold. Before the referee can ask if Gordon wants to give up, Kelly gets into the ring and hits Raine with a Superkick, forcing him to release his hold on Gordon. Kelly gets back to her corner as the referee scolds her for being in the ring. Gordon pulls Raine towards his corner, but Serena quickly hops off of the apron and runs around the ring, yanking Kelly off of the apron before Gordon can make the tag. Kelly turns to Serena and they start exchanging punches until the referee gets out of the ring to pull them apart. While the referee was dealing with the women on the outside of the ring, Gordon got Raine down to one knee after a Running Calf Kick. Raine was set up perfectly for ‘Destination Fucked’ but before Gordon could connect, Raine dove out of the way before springing to his feet and connecting with a Shining Wizard. Raine doesn’t stop there, he decides to climb to the top rope and jumps off with his variation of the Double Foot Stomp, Rainedrop. He goes for the pin but Gordon kicks out to the fans delight right before the three count. Raine aggressively pulled Gordon to his feet and dragged him towards his corner, tagging in the hungry for action, Serena.]

TR: Hell hath no Fury like a woman.

BM: I think you mean like a woman scorned.

TR: Nope. Just ‘like a woman’ shall suffice.

[Once Serena is in the ring, Raine holds Gordon up with his arms behind his back allowing Serena to get a few punches into Gordons midsection before taking Gordon down with a Spin Kick. Raine exits the ring while Serena laughs in Kellys direction, who seems to be getting more agitated. Serena begins to pick Gordon apart with a legdrop while he was down followed by a Lionsault. Kelly started to clap her hands, trying to get crowd momentum behind Gordon, which pissed off Serena who took her attention away from Gordon just to walk over to Kelly, yelling in her face. Serena throws a punch, but Kelly grips onto the ropes and leans back so Serena misses and before Serena can react, Gordon is back to his feet spinning Serena around so he can hit her with a kick to the midsection which doubles her over, followed by a spinning back kick to the head. Before he can finish his combo move, the effects of the match take their toll and he falls to one knee. Kelly is leaning over the top rope, practically begging Gordon for the tag and once their hands connect, the crowds go wild. Kelly enters the ring with fire in her eyes as Serena gets back to her feet. Kelly took full control of the match showcasing her speed and flexibility and after hitting Serena with her variation of a 720 DDT she hoped to pick up the pin, but Raine came charging into the ring driving his elbow down onto Kellys back. Raine pulls Kelly to her feet before hitting her with a backbreaker. This allowed Serena enough time to get to her feet. Raine jumps up onto the middle rope and does a springboard moonsault while Serena jumps onto another middle rope and does a springboard moonsault immediately afterwards to Kelly. The referee orders Raine out of the ring but he ignores him, Gordon bursts into the ring and takes Raine down with a Spear before throwing punches to him while he was down. Unknown to Gordon, Serena had summoned up enough strength to throw her arm over Kelly so the referee dropped for the count.]

1
2
3

DING DING DING!

TH: Here are your winners….WAR ENFORCEMENT!

[The arena instantly fills up with boos as Gordon sits up in shock releasing what had happened as War Enforcements music begins to play. Raine rolls out of the ring followed by Serena, who starts to wildly laugh towards Gordon and Kelly. Gordon crawls to Kelly to check on her as Raine and Serena walk backwards up the ramp.]

BM: These fans are not happy with this outcome tonight.

TR: War Enforcement came to conquer tonight Brian and this was just the first step. Later tonight the leader will take it all when he beats Owen for the In Your House Championship.

BM: Well I for one am certainly hoping for a different outcome on that match.

TR: One championship has already changed hands tonight, we still have three championship matches to go.

BM: Well we’re certainly not out of tag team action yet as up next we’ll see reigning champions Murphys Law take on Uncanny Socialites.
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Chris Cryptic
 Posted: Jul 19 2017, 11:40 PM
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[The pre-recorded video starts up in black and white. We see a large shot of a massive desk. Resting in the center of the desk are the two IYH Tag Team Championship belts. Two glass awards sit a bit front of the belts. The camera tilts downward and zooms in on what’s written on the glass—In Your House Season One Tag Team of the Season: Murphy's Law.

As the camera tilts upward once more, we see .PAAK seated by behind the desk. She has on a woman’s pants suit and dark colored loafers, along with a fedora. Her legs are crossed and her feet sit comfortable on the edge of the desk. As the camera pans over to the left, we see Misha LeCavalier seated on the desk. She has on a dark colored romper, outfitted with Vince Camuto booties.]

.PAAK: It has been an interesting couple of months, hasn’t it? Despite the blood, sweat, and tears that were shed during our rise to the top, people still couldn’t find it in their black little hearts to be happy for us. Many were hoping and praying that our downfall would occur at Dawn of Immortals—but that did not happen. Just as we did at Ground N’ Pound, Misha and I rose to the occasion.

[She nods her head.]

.PAAK: And then came our string of main events.

[A quick pause.]

.PAAK: First came our match against the not so mighty War Enforcement. We took our lumps, but we gave some right back. We got beaten down, but we rose at the end of the night. And at the end of the day, we received a W in our column. Next came our bout against against the Proving Grounds Champion and the IYH Champion. Another match, another victory. It would have been a perfect victory, had it not been for Sabbath’s interference. Lastly, there was Layton & Fenric. They were tough. However, a Ruinous Requiem spelled the end for them.

ML: Three wonderful bouts, notwithstanding the actions of others.

[.PAAK nods once more.]

.PAAK: Night in and night out, we continue to show why are the best tag team within IYH. And if you do not believe us, well, these seem to speak for themselves, don’t they?

[.PAAK spreads her arms across the championship belts and awards.]

.PAAK: Those of you who hope and pray for our downfall, you merely add fuel to our ever growing fire. You merely motivate us to compete at an even higher level...

ML: That shall be on full display at Mind Your Own Fuckhole.

[Misha turns her head a bit more towards the camera.]

ML: The Uncanny Socialites. There is much that I could say about you two after our little encounter the other day. We learned oh so much about you two, far more than any match or promotional video could provide. Yes indeed.

[She lets out a small grunt.]

ML: Kelsey, Rebecca, there are many difference between our two teams, and those difference don’t simply boil down to Murphy’s Law holding the belts. I know that’s the narrative you two would like perpetrated about. You truly believe you are our level—cute. Nevertheless, we both know that’s not the case; that fact should be apparent to both of you by now.

[There’s a small pause.]

ML: By now, it is quite clear that .PAAK and I are an amazing team, which is a little surprising if you think about it. She and I did not know each other prior to IYH; in fact, we’d never even heard of each other. Mutual associates and contacts made an educated guess that we’d click—they were correct. You two claim to have studied us, did you notice our chemistry in those early bouts? We wrestled as if we’d known each other for centuries, which serves as evidence to our respective levels of talent.

But despite how well we clicked, despite our respective greatness, even she and I had our struggles. People’s jealousy often blinds them from perceiving that fact. People act as if we simply waltzed in and stoles these belts. Nevertheless, our path to these IYH Tag Team Championships were not easy. We had to endure embarrassment. We had to endure ridicule. We had to endure pain…

Murphy's Law had many sleepless nights, nights where we’d stay up hours trying to find a way to somehow achieve our goals. Nights where we thought about quitting and walking away from IYH without fulfilling our destiny. And after each session, we came to our senses; after each session, we vowed to press on.

In the midst of thunderstorms and turmoil, .PAAK and I remain as calm as we can. In the midst of mental anguish, we still appear to be cool as the other side of the pillow. And no matter what we were going through, we are collected and solidified as unit.

[She let’s her words linger in the air a bit.]

ML: Murphy's Law isn’t just a tag team, it’s a sisterhood.

[Misha’s eyebrow rose up.]

ML: Now, let us compare that to you two…

Ms. Spencer, in truth, I have very little qualms with you. You are the heart of the team in my opinion, a soldier fighting the good fight. And based on your little event, you are the peacemaker as well. Such a noble woman.

I suppose the only fault I can really find against you is aligning yourself with Ms. Saint. Or should I say re-aligning.

[She shakes her head.]

ML: What were the words I used to describe you, Ms. Saint? Aggressive. Arrogant. Foul-mouthed. You are the distinguishing factor between Murphy’s Law and The Uncanny Socialites. Your hyper aggressiveness prevents your team from remaining as calm as you can. Your arrogance is unearned and it leaves you looking hotter than the Devil in Miami. And your vulgarity reveals your hotheadedness; you weaken your unity.

[.PAAK shakes her head.]

.PAAK: Ms. Saint, I gave you a piece of advice. I sincerely hope that you took it to heart.

[Misha grunts.]

ML: I doubt it, love. Haughtiness beget hotheadedness. But, it’s alright. You did your best.

[Misha cracks her knuckles as she begins to speak again.]

ML: Rebecca, Kelsey, I want you both to know something. Contrary to popular belief, we don’t underestimate any team that comes across our path, that includes you two. I do not care what the blog sites say. I do not care what the Twitter polls say. The fact of that matter is, you two want what we have; you two want what every team in this promotion wants. Calm, cool, and collected or not, you’re going to fight with all of your heart to take what’s ours.

.PAAK: And we shall fight with all our heart and might shut your shit down—period.

[.PAAK nods.]

.PAAK: This match has great implications. No team within IYH has had two successful defenses. However, as Misha said on Twitter, it is high time that situation be rectified. And what better team is there to rewrite history than Misha and I?

ML: The answer is that there is no better team.

[There’s a small pause.]

ML: This bout is not going to be an everyday pay-per-view match, ladies. This is a history making match; therefore, you’re going to see a different side of us. A side that’s even more focused, more relentless. And ultimately, a side that’s far more dangerous than the norm.

[Misha gently rubs her chin after her statement as she thinks about something.]

ML: You know, our little meeting revealed something else. There seems to be this notion that we do and say things because we want you all to fear us. That time have been true and at one point in time, but that’s not the case any longer.

.PAAK: Quite the opposite—we encourage that no fear attitude.

ML: True indeed. True indeed.

[A smirk creeps across Misha’s lips.]

ML: Kelsey, Rebecca, we don’t want you to fear us. Fear cripples. We speak the way we do because we want you to be fully informed about what is going to happen to you. Nonetheless, we want you to walk into this match hell-bent on wiping our asses. And why? Well, because no one likes a dead fish.

We want you both at your best—so that when we beat you, there will be no excuses. I want your at your best, so I can have the personal pleasure of watching your hopes and dreams shatter in front of my very eyes. I want you at your best so that I may hear those fools in the stands scream down insults and wail in disappointment—At least they’ll have a valid fucking reason to this time.

[After the heaviness of Misha’s words, the camera shifts over to .PAAK to finishing things off.]

.PAAK: History shall be made at Mind Your Own Fuckhole, ladies. And you two get to be apart of it. Count yourselves lucky.

[The camera fades out.]


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Tag Team Championship Match
Tag Team Match
Murphys Law © vs Uncanny Socialites

DING DING DING!

[The match kicks off with PAAK and Rebecca locking up in the center of the ring, Rebecca gets .PAAK into a headlock but .PAAK instantly throws her elbow back into Rebeccas midsection. Before Rebecca can even think about shaking it off, .PAAK hits her with a roundhouse kick that knocks Rebecca against the ropes. .PAAK proceeded to keep Rebecca at bay with multiple hard chops with her palm across Rebeccas chest before hitting her with a Snapmare Driver hoping to finish the match here, but Rebecca kicked out on the two count. Pulling Rebecca back to her feet, PAAK pulled her towards Murphys Laws corner, but suddenly Rebecca breaks free by headbutting PAAK. There is a shift in the crowd momentum as Rebecca tosses PAAK into the ropes away from Misha and catching her with a dropkick on the rebound.]

BM: Rebecca can pull this back for Uncanny Socialites tonight!

TR: Are you kidding me? Murphys Law are reigning champs for a reason, it’s going to take more than a Saint to stop them.

[As the match continued, Rebecca worked over .PAAK until she had her hunched in hers and Kelseys corner. Rebecca got the tag and once Kelsey entered the ring, the team delivered a mix of chops to .PAAKs chest until Kelsey hits a Superkick on her and Rebecca hits an Elbow Smash. Kelsey catches PAAK and hits a Spitfire Suplex into a pin, but the ref doesn’t count, he’s already distracted by the fact Misha has had enough and stormed into the ring. She instantly exchanges punches with Rebecca until she catches Rebecca with a European Uppercut. Kelsey gets back to her feet only to be met with a King Kong Lariat which knocks her right back down again. The referee makes Misha go back to her corner as she holds her hands up defensively, a chilling calm washed over her. Rebecca was back to her feet and charged towards Misha but the referee kept her at bay until she took a deep breath and went back to her own corner also.]

BM: Uncanny Socialites thought they had this match won with that combo move they like to call the “Candy-Coated Fury”

TR: But they forgot one critical detail, Misha was waiting like a lioness stalking its prey until that hunger for blood became too much, so she came in like a ‘Queen Slayer’.

[.PAAK sniper crawled across the ring to get to her corner, Kelsey started to stir and got back to her feet, she noticed .PAAK inching closer and closer and tried to make a run at her to stop her getting the tag, but just as Kelsey reached .PAAK, PAAK leaped towards Misha connecting with a tag. Misha entered the ring with fire in her eyes, Kelsey attempted to throw the first punch but Misha instinctively blocked it before wildly whipping her hand against Kelseys chest; paying her back for all those chops Uncanny Socialites gave to .PAAK. Misha pushes Kelsey back against the ropes and winds her hand back for one last chop, but Kelsey gets a good grip on the top rope and uses it as leverage to kick her feet up onto Mishas stomach and quickly kicks her away. Misha stumbles back but doesn’t fall and this just seems to make her more pissed off as she comes at Kelsey with more anger. Kelsey jumps onto the second rope and takes down Misha with a Flying Forearm. Kelsey sees her opportunity and tries to lock Misha up in the Texas Cloverleaf, but Misha kicks her legs free before Kelsey can lock it in. Misha is back to her feet and lunges at Kelsey. The two of them lock up but Misha is quick to take Kelsey down with a back heel trip before quickly locking her up in a Seated Fujiwara Armbar. Rebecca dashes into the ring hoping to break the submission, but .PAAK comes in out of nowhere and hits Rebecca with a Slingblade. Kelsey lets out a loud scream, desperately stretching her free hand out to the bottom rope but knowing she’s too far away, she reluctantly taps out.]

TH: Here are your winners and STILL Tag Team Champions….MURPHYS LAW!

[Misha still continues to keep Kelsey locked on the move, the bell rings for a second time as the referee tries to pry Misha away. Misha finally releases the hold as the fans boos fill the air. .PAAK hands Misha her belt as they raise them high in the air in victory. Misha takes one last look at their fallen opponents before dropping out of the ring and heading up the ramp with .PAAK by her side.]

BM: What a match that was, I didn’t think Misha was going to let go of Kelseys arm until it broke off.

TR: No one ever said Misha wasn’t a dangerous woman. She has been making quite a name for herself trying to dislocate opponents.

BM: I’m sure this will not be the last time Uncanny Socialites and Murphys Law compete in this ring.

TR: But enough about tag team action. We’ve finally reached the moment people have been waiting for weeks to see.

BM: That’s right, it’s time to see who is going to become the Champion of our new belt, The Rapid Fire Championship. The Twitter polls are in favor of Craig Anderson but Sam Amos is no pushover. Both of these men want to make history tonight.

TR: I’d rather see the belt on a guy like Sam Amos. He reminds me of myself in a lot of ways.

BM: Like his womanizing?

TR: I was talking about his tattoos and well slicked hair….but yes, that too.


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[The scene cuts to backstage where Kelly Fury is sitting with a pack of ice on her ribs, looking defeated emotionally as well as physically. A hand reaches into the scene placing a chocolate pudding cup onto the table next to her. Kellys eyes go from the pudding, slowly up to the hand that gave it, Gordon Fury. Kelly lightly shakes her head and sighs as she looks away.]

KF: Pudding doesn’t fix everything, Gordon.

[Gordon reaches for the pudding to take it away, but before his hand reaches it, Kellys smacks it away.]

KF: Gifts that are given cannot be taken back, GORDON!

[He lightly shakes his head as he paces the locker room.

GF: This is such bullshit. We had that. Fucking tag team matches. I TOLD you that there is a reason I don’t do fucking tag team matches.

KF: Hey, don’t you put this on tag team matches! If you had tried at all to actually approach this match as a /team/ it may have ended differently. I tried to call you a few times to train with me and you were all like..

[Kelly attempts to do her best Australian accent, which isn’t that great.]

KF: Sorry mate, no can kangaroo-a-doo. We know we can beat these fuckheads fair dinkums.

[Gordon lets out a pained groan, before letting out a frustrated sigh. Hearing no rebuttal, she continues.]

KF: If you had of just trusted me and my knowledge of tag team matches, the outcome tonight would have been totally different.

[Gordon slumps down on the bench, starting to cut off his tape.

GF: It might have.

[There are a few moments of pained silence before Gordon looks up to her.]

GF: I fucked up. I underestimated their strength as a team and it fucked us. But this is not over, I refuse to allow this to end here after all of the shit they have put me-

[He catches himself.]

GF: -/us/ through. They think they’ve put the nail in the coffin, but I’m not fucking ready to die yet. But when the time comes for us to fight again, things can’t go the way they went tonight.

[He takes another deep breathe, before speaking very quietly.]

GF: I wanna approach this like a proper tag team. With you.

[Kelly leans her head a little closer to Gordons.]

KF: Sorry what was that? I couldn’t quite hear you.

GF: Yes you could.

[Kelly rolls her eyes.]

KF: I mean...after all those Moonsaults my ears are still kind of ringing but whatevs…

[She turns to Gordon with a smirk.]

GF: I want to tag with you properly.

[She smiles a content smile, before narrowing her eyes at him.]

KF: If you mean that, and I mean if you really really really mean that and swear on Leahs boobs that you’ll listen to me and agree to let me train you in the art of tag team matches...then we can do this. If not, you’re forever the lame Fury and I hate your face.

GF: Sure, something like that.

KF: Is that yeeeees?

GF: ...yes.

[Kelly gets up clapping her hands excitedly, before clearing her throat trying her best to seem more professional over their arrangements.]

KF: You have a deal, Gordy Wordy. Now, let’s discuss tag team names!

[Kelly snatches her pudding from the table and links arms with Gordon to walk down the hall with him.]

KF: How do you feel about, Double Mint Fury.

GF: No.

[The scene fades as Kelly keeps throwing tag team names at Gordon.]


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Rapid Fire Championship Match
Singles Match
Sam Amos vs Craig Anderson

DING DING DING!

[Craig comes out with a spinning heel kick off the bat but Sam dodges Anderson’s leg, avoiding contact by centimeters before he shoots the ropes, rebounding off and coming at Craig with a flying forearm. As the two men get to their feet, Craig is quicker and lunges forward, grabbing Sam for belly-to-back suplex. He goes for a quick cover but only nets a two. Once Anderson gets to his feet, he looks for Amos but doesn’t see him until he turns and takes a kick to the gut, Sam shoots the ropes and hits a swinging neckbreaker on the bent Anderson. Craig clutches his head once he hits the mat, then he rolls onto his elbows and knees, Sam slides, dropping to his knees, and locks him in a front facelock and immediately begins wrenching the neck.]

BM: If Craig taps out here, we’ll have our first ever Rapid Fire Champion.

TR: I’m sure he and Vivian already have a wild night of celebrating planned out.

BM: Don’t count Craig out just yet Tats, listen to this crowd, Craig is really trying to get out of that move.

[Craig struggles hard with the fans cheering him on, and within moments is able to find a somewhat vertical base. Sam continues to wrench the hold and Craig is showing a little frustration at being unable to break the seemingly simple hold, but he is eventually able to stand up, removing Sam's leverage. After two hard jabs to Sam's ribcage, Amos lets go but elbow smashes him before hitting a Northern Lights Suplex. The crowd boos heavily as he pins the popular Craig - but the referee looks up and sees Sam has his feet on the ropes for extra leverage! He warns Sam who gets up in his face and tells him not to tell him what to do, even if it is his job! He sees Craig rise out of the corner of his eye and delivers a massive superkick! The fans gasp as Craig lays still, Sam goes to cover but he kicks out at two and three quarters! Sam is livid, he shoots to his feet and tells off the referee again, but this time he misses when Craig recovers and Anderson catches him with the Zig-a-zig-ah, the swinging lifting inverted DDT keeping Sam down long enough for three!]

1!

2!

3!

DING DING DING!

TH: And here is your winner via pinfall… and your Inaugural Rapid Fire Champion… CRAIG ANDERSON!

BM: Good for him, good for Craig Anderson, he had a tough fight against the dastardly Sam Amos!

TR: Jesus Christ did you really just use the word dastardly? Sam was just trying to win, nothing more and nothing less!

["One Step Beyond" by Madness plays as Craig celebrates his win and becoming champion, Sam kicks the ropes, swears that the referee robbed him then storms out in search of his lady and a beer.]


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[The scene opens up backstage in a seemingly empty hallway until Stevie Trelain appears looking rather shocked, microphone in hand like she’s ready to conduct an interview. She turns to the camera and begins.]

ST: Ladies and gentlemen, it seems we have a surprise guest here tonight, the one...the only…

[Suddenly a female cackle is heard, an all too familiar cackle as Angelica Layne steps in front of the camera with a grin plastered on her face, the crowds can be heard throughout the arena going wild. She looks directly into the camera and says…]

AL: Boo!

ST: Angelica, this is the first time we have seen you since the end of season one. How is the recovery process going?

AL: It’s going well, Stevie. I had my surgery thanks to Michael Diablo forcing me to have it and now I’m undergoing the painful process of rehabbing my shoulder. Fun fucking times, Stevie. Fun fucking times.

ST: So, as much as we are excited to see you here tonight...what exactly are you doing here?

[Angelica turns to look at Stevie, glaring at her for a moment before continuing.]

AL: Well obviously I’m here to see firsthand just why all these cunts in the back are destroying In Your House…

[Stevie seems a little taken back by Angelicas answer.]

ST: I don’t think I’d say they are destroying it, if anything Season Two has gone off with a bang.

AL: Fucking literally, did you see that shit Seth Isis did earlier? That was pretty hilarious actually.

ST: That’s Seth ISER.

AL: Whatever. Using cheap tricks to win a championship is a tacky mans game. And am I supposed to be impressed that biscuit loving freak beat Sam Amos to win a fancy new belt for matches you have to complete in 10 minutes? Nah. We all know I like my matches to last a lot longer than that. But really Stevie, tonight I came here to keep an eye on MY championship. See, Owen thinks he’s all high and mighty right now and I don’t necessarily blame him. With me resting up at home he has no reason to shit himself over me coming after him...until he sees this right before his match, of course. Paranoia is a helluva drug.

ST: But you’re not cleared to wrestle.

AL: I don’t have to throw a punch at Owen to knock him off his game. Diamond Jack Sabbath proved that a few weeks ago. But Stevie, Mind Your Own Fuckhole has always been known for being memorable. From it’s oh so catchy name, me beating Shawn Fox in In Your Houses first ever Cage Match, to the glorious Michael Diablo beating Ken Rapasaki and Dick Kreiger to become one of the best champions this company has ever seen. Next to me, of course!

[Angelica turns and winks into the camera before looking back at Stevie with a smirk.]

AL: And then we have this….meh...card that people think on paper looks great but deep down those fans know this years show, hasn’t packed quite the punch that last years did. But you can ease your mind, Stevie. I’m not /actually/ here to cause any trouble tonight. I’m going to take my seat next to Mike in the crowd to witness Owen, or Jack getting their asses kicked. No more, no less.

[And with that, Angelica turns away from Stevie and walks off while Stevie looks back to the camera.]

ST: There you have it folks, former In Your House Champions Angelica Layne and Michael Diablo are in the building to witness our final match of the night. Back to you guys at ringside.

[The Show cuts to ringside.]


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MAIN EVENT
In Your House Championship Match
Singles Match
Owen Gonsalves © vs Diamond Jack Sabbath

DING DING DING!

[Glaring from across the ring, the two competitors then rush to the centre for a clinch before Jack drives a hard knee into the midsection. Owen staggers back. Jack rushes towards him, only to get caught with a drop toehold. Owen immediately works to trap Jack’s leg for a single leg boston crab but Jack quickly crawls across the ring to get to the bottom rope. The referee separates them, with Owen still trying to lock the leg. Owen finally backs off with a smirk on his face while Jack lashes out verbally as he rises to his feet. With wary looks, they slowly approach each other and Owen baits for another clinch but Jack has other ideas as he serves up a body kick that stops Owen short. As Owen doubles over, Jack hooks his arm to trap him in a frenzied series of forearm smashes. With nowhere to go, Owen falls in a helpless daze. Jack then connects with a belly-to-belly suplex, causing Owen to tumble across the ring. Pulling himself up in the corner, Owen tries to regain his bearings just as Jack comes crushing him with a body avalanche. Owen crumples to the mat from impact. But before Jack can go for the cover, Owen rolls out of the ring. This visibly pisses off Jack as he demands for Owen to come back inside. Owen crawls away to get more distance while catching his breath. The referee advises Jack to back off from the ropes to allow Owen some space. Annoyed, Jack brushes off the ref, but not realising that Owen is now back on his feet to pull Jack’s legs. With Jack falling on his back, Owen drags him out of the ring and tosses him shoulder-first into the crowd barricade, making the fans in the front row to stand and cheer. Not wasting any more time, Owen hops up onto the ring apron as Jack pulls himself up. With the crowd on their feet, Owen leaps off the apron and lands on Jack with the meteora. The entire arena goes ballistic as both competitors crash on the outside floor.

It takes a while for either of them to start moving again. Owen guides Jack back into the ring before going for the cover, only getting a two-count. Owen gets up first and immediately sets to work on the right arm, the same one that hurts when Jack hit the barricade earlier. Jack tries to shove Owen away but Owen has the arm locked in a standing armbar, bending the fingers in awkward ways in his trademark finger manipulation method. Jack howls in agony before pushing through it and eventually escaping the hold. Owen irish whips Jack to the corner. As Jack slumps there, Owen charges at him. Jack moves out of the way in time, leaving Owen to crash and burn hard. Owen staggers out of there, only for Jack to knock him down with a vicious bicycle kick. Jack hooks Owen’s leg for the pin but the champion gets his shoulder up before three. Massaging his right shoulder, Jack yanks Owen to his feet and tosses him right over the ropes. Owen lands on the outside floor with a thud. Jack winces as he slides out of the ring and proceeds to attack Owen with a stiff forearm shot. The referee restarts his count. Owen stumbles away, desperately trying to regain his bearings. Jack chases after him to smash his face right into the barricade. Owen falls on his knees but still manages to keep crawling away. Jack pulls him back up, runs towards the steel steps and tosses him right into them. Owen lies on the floor, unable to move with a cut above his eye. The crowd jeers passionately while Jack looks down on the champ with an evil smile, taking his time to admire his work thus far. But then he turns his attention towards the announcers table with a look of wild hunger in his eyes. Realising what he might have in mind, the fans rally together in protest against Jack who now drags Owen over to set him up on top of the table. While the fans can only look on in horror, Jack then drops Owen in a huge scoop powerslam, leaving the champ completely lifeless at this point, as the table caves in on one side under the crushing force of the impact. Both competitors fall on the floor in a heap out of exhaustion. The referee continues to count before Jack struggles to get Owen back inside the ring. Jack goes for the cover but much to his dismay, Owen rolls his shoulder up right before three. The fans break out in relieved cheers.

Not satisfied, Jack pulls Owen back down and hooks his leg for a second pin. Owen kicks out at two. Jack tries again and Owen kicks out again. Completely pissed off, Jack stands up and starts stomping multiple times on Owen. Jack pulls up Owen and irish whips him hard into the corner. Owen falls on his behind from impact before Jack comes marching over. As Jack reaches to grab him, Owen pulls him down, causing him to fall face first into the middle tier turnbuckle. This buys Owen enough time to rise to his feet before kicking Jack in the midsection, doubling him over. Owen then smoothly connects with his double underhook piledriver finisher, Final Gambit. The arena explodes in excitement as they count along with the referee.

1!

2!

THR--

KICKOUT!

This time, it’s everyone but Jack who gets crushed with disappointment as the nefarious challenger kicks out of the pin. Owen pulls up Jack who fights back weakly before irish whipping Jack to the other side. Jack reverses the throw, sending him there instead. Owen jumps onto the middle ropes and twists in midair to knock down Jack with a springboard corkscrew european uppercut. It stuns Jack for a second as he lies flat on his back with eyes glazed. Owen scrambles for the cover but only gets a two-count. Owen slowly rises to his feet, pulling up Jack with him. Owen then wrenches Jack’s arm for a hammerlock before forcing him to his knees. Jack struggles in the hold as he doubles over but then straightens up to regain the strength to rise to his feet again. Jack then throws back elbows to Owen’s face before countering further with a back suplex. As Owen pulls himself up, Jack grabs him around the waist for a vicious german suplex. Despite the effects of the hit, Owen rolls over to push himself up instinctively. Like a predator stalking his prey, Jack waits for Owen to rise to his knees. With Owen’s head lolling forward, Jack then delivers his thunderous roundhouse kick to the head finisher, The Crown Kick. A near complete hush falls over the arena as Jack goes for the cover on the lifeless Owen.

1!

2!

THR--

KICKOUT!

But somehow, Owen comes back alive to kick out just before three and the arena breaks out in excitement. Jack can’t believe it as he lies back, stunned, while the fans start chanting Owen’s name. Jack returns to vertical base and waits for Owen to get back up again, his arms stretched out and cheeks puffing in and out. As Owen rises to his feet, Jack prepares for another one of The Crown Kick but Owen manages to dodge it, leaving Jack to spin around. With Jack’s back turned, Owen seizes the opportunity to sweep Jack in a sneaky rollup pin. Jack frantically struggles under Owen’s weight.]

1!

2!

3!

DING DING DING!

TH: And here’s your winner… AND STILL the In Your House champion, Owen Gonsalves!

[The arena explodes in cheers as “Blockbuster Night Part 1” by Run The Jewels plays on the sound system. Owen rolls out of the way as Jack stares up at the ceiling in exhaustion and disbelief. The fans celebrate while the referee presents the IYH title back to Owen who can barely sit up. Managing a tired smile, Owen raises the title above his head before relapsing in exhaustion. The referee helps him up and raises his hand in victory, inviting a huge round of cheers from the crowd. As Owen leans over the ropes for support, the referee checks on Jack who’s only starting to come to.]

BM: What. A. Match. What a championship battle! What a victory!

TR: I think that was one of the most intense matches we’ve ever witnessed.

BM: I agree, Tats. A few close calls there and I thought we’d see a new champ tonight.

TR: We would have, if SOMEBODY didn’t just win via a fucking rollup!

BM: It’s a legitimate pin, mate. Very, very close match!

TR: This ain’t over, that’s for sure!

[Jack is seething in the ring as the ref hands Owen back the In Your House Championship.]

TR: That was Jack’s match to lose, and Owen only got there by the skin of his teeth!

BM: Taking a page from your book, it doesn’t matter how you win, as long as you win.

TR: Fair point Bry, fair point.

[Owen mounts the far turnbuckle and raises the belt above his head, the fans cheering as his music plays. Suddenly out of the corner of the camera you see a large man jump the guardrail and slide into the ring. Jack gets to his feet and turns, locking eyes with the man for but a moment before he sprints full speed across the ring and almost rips him in half with a vicious spear! Owen’s music is cut as the fans explode in a mixed reaction, now seeing who the man is.]

TR: Oh my fucking god I can’t believe this! Its Rick Kreiger!

BM: The Alpha Beast is back, Tats! We haven’t seen Rick since shortly after his loss to Michael Diablo in their last man standing match, but here he is destroying Jack with The Blitzkreig!

TR: He’s not the only one, he’s lining up the champ, and he has no idea what’s waiting for him!

[A look of confusion crosses Owen’s face as his music cuts out and at the fans reaction. He jumps down from the turnbuckle, turning to see what is going on, and he no sooner hits the ground before Rick spears Owen almost out of his boots with a BlitzKreig!

TR: There’s your congratulatory present for your win, champ!

[Jack has already rolled out of the ring, slowly making his way up the ramp, as Rick stands over Owen’s body. The mixed reaction is now firmly boos as Rick reaches down and picks up the In Your House Championship, raising it above his head as the boos intensify.]

BM: Well ladies and gentlemen, what a way to end Mind Your Own Fuckhole!

TR: No doubt Bry. The ramifications of this event are gonna be interesting to say the least.

BM: To say the /absolute/ least. Good night ladies and gentlemen, and we’ll see you all for the next Ruckus!

[The show fades to black.]

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